The Higby Notch

38 Things that I have learned in 38 years

2007-05-07T20:30:00.000-06:00

Happy birthday to me. Happy birthday to me. In the spirit of celebration I have listed 38 things that I have learned in the last 38 years. 1. Hugs don't cost a thing but are worth millions. 2. The words "I'm sorry" are as powerful as "I love you." 3. You can get a prescription for a Chihuahua if you have asthma. 4. New socks feel good on my feet. 5. Budweiser and pickled eggs makes for a rank fart in the morning. 6. Dune is a great movie. 7. Paste still tastes good. 8. Gay marriage is okay as long as both chicks are hot. 9. The coyote never wins but he never gives up. 10. The sound of fire hose "flaking off" the back of a pumper is sweet! 11. Dance like nobody is looking even when nobody is looking. 12. Mojo is stronger than the force. 13. Government cheese is good on animal crackers. 14. God is in the details. 15. For everything you loose, something new will replace it. You just may not notice it yet. 16. Japanese people have funny names. 17. Jack Lambert was one mean football player. 18. Moderation is only good in moderation. 19. God has his "A" game on when he made the female body. 20. All men are created equal, women are created better. 21. Sosa's are damn fine cigars. 22. Hearing "I love you daddy" opens my eyes, softens my hearts, and empties my wallet. 23. Seeing a guy getting hit in the balls with a wiffle-ball bat is still very funny. 24. That gooey-yellow thing in "pork-n-Beans" is the "pork." 25. Herbie Hancock and Earle Clugh are musical masters. 26. There is "something" out there. 27. Rock-n-roll ain't noise pollution. 28. A hemi cuda will smoke a big block camaro. 29. Going to bed with an itchy butt will cause you to wake up with smelly fingers. 30. I like sleeping on top of the covers. 31. Ice cream is better served cold. 32. Revenge is a dish best kept in the back of the fridge until it turns green and hairy and then you throw it away. 33. The best way to handle conflict is to confront it. 34. Houdini rhymes with weenie. 35. The smell of my wife's hair makes me sleep better. 36. It is easier to pee sitting down when you are sleepy. 37. Dogs are good. 38. A rich man invests in his family. Keep it real yo.

Life is good today.

2007-05-06T17:50:00.000-06:00

We all have times in our lives that sometime just plain suck. But there also times when things are going good. Today things are good. Very good. We had a get together for my birthday today. It was family and friends and it was so very nice. My buddy Jay helped me install crown molding in the living room and it looks good. I had to buy a new finish nail gun. It came in a box along with a brad nailer. I already had a brad nailer so I gave the new one to Jay. Mojo is good when good mojo gets past along. Ms. Jay made me a chocolate cake with chocolate icing. It was awsome. My little bride has fluttered around me allday. I feel special. As MUD stated the storms are getting bad but it is that time of year. All that I can say for our Kansas family is "RUN!" Keep safe and watch out for each other.

Okay, Okay, it is almost my birthday.....

2007-05-05T17:05:00.000-06:00

Well kids guess what.....I gotta a laptop, I gotta a laptop, all to myself. My little bride got me one. I am as happy as a puppy with 2 peters..... So now I can blog anytime.

The White Trash Yacht Club

2007-04-24T19:08:00.000-06:00

The guys and me at the firehouse have started the White Trash Yacht Club. Our first regata is scheduled for May 5. We are all planning to go set "jug" lines and catch a bunch of catfish. This all started when Booger, our rookie, brought his boat to the station one shift so that we could work on it. Next Eric brings his. So, I got one. Oh they are fine vessels. Booger and Eric's are jon-boats with 20 hp motors. Mine is an old 14 foot aluminum modified vee that I aguired from Lloyd Allen. It is a fixer-upper for sure. We are all pretty excited about it. We missed a few tornadoes today. Wall clouds everywhere, but no funnels. talk to you soon.

I messed up a bit and Larry king is an ass.

2007-04-18T19:02:00.000-06:00

I think that I have mentioned it before but for those of us older than 35 here it is again. You gotta be careful when you load your colon. Case in point: Last night my little bride made us nice leafy salad with all of the good stuff. I ate it. It was good. Now the problem. This morning I had, without properly thinking it through, a piece of rye toast, a cup of strong coffee, and...wait for it...a bowl of raisin bran. You guessed I O-F'd (over fibered). About 11 this morning I bent down to pick up a wrench and felt a "gurgle-gurgle" in my belly. With little haste and even less fanfare I hot lapped it to the shop bathroom. If you have never been in a mechanic shop's bathroom you have never seen filth in such magnitude. After a some "nesting" I, well, you know. Needless to say it was impressive. The aroma was of level that was a rival to any firehouse bunk room after chilidog night. I peeked out of the doorway to see if anybody was around. The coast was clear and I left in a stealth like manor. After about 5 minutes I had to go to parts and get a hose and hydraulic fittings. The bathroom is on the way to the parts counter. Another mechanic that works there, Sam, was a few feet ahead of me. As he passed the bathroom he exclaimed "Dear God, what is that awful smell!" Not to tell on myself I said "It was Darrold, that old bastard ain't right." Sam replied "I know, that man can stink-up a bathroom like nobody else." I kept walking. Now Larry King. Last night we watched him interview family and survivors of the Virgina Tech shootings. He is about as talented as a spider monkey. His questions were small minded and of poor taste. "Did you see your friends get shot?", "Were you scared?", "Can I have some more grape juice?" Oh well. Talk to you later...uh oh....Gurgle Gurgle......

Wow, over a month.

2007-04-14T08:56:00.000-06:00

Well kids, I've been rather busy. Sorry to keep myself away from the blogs but the world needs John Deere tractors and It is my other job to set them up. It is kinda of funny that at this point in my professional life it get as excited about doing a dyno test on a John Deere 5103 with a SCV as I would about a fire. I still have my "love" for the job, I am just a little tired of dealing with city hall. I just finished teaching a "Fire Service Instructor Level One" class for a group of firefighters from around the state. It was a very good class and everybody passed their certification exams. Lets see what else is going on. I am having an article published in Fire Engineering Magazine titled "Self Directed Learning: A new approach to company level training." And I have been asked to prepare a paper for presentation at the Fire Department Instructors Conference in Indiana next spring. Kind of neat. I am disappointed with the IAFF supporting Hillary Clinton so early. I know that big labor always backs the Dems, but come on brothers and sisters. It is baseball season, does anybody care? I feel that the boys of Summer have never really recovered after the strike. Speaking of sports, what about Don Imus. OOPS! I was watching the NFL network recently. They were showing the NFL combine.This where NFL hopefuls demonstrate their skills prior to the draft. This year there was a difference. A new factor played into what round the athlete would be drafted in. It was how much legal trouble he had been in or is in. Apparently drugs and domestic violence can knock you down a few spots. Attempted murder or A&B on a cop can move you up a few. Well that is about it. Everybody is doing fine. Keep in touch.

Sunday Morning on Spring Street

2007-03-12T04:28:00.000-06:00

Every year Rebecca and I go to a little place around Eureka Springs for our anniversery. We usually get there on Friday and leave on Sunday. We do a lot of stuff while there. One of my favorite things to do (besides the obvious) is to go to downtown Eureka Springs on a Sunday morning. The streets are not very crowded and there is little traffic. The shop owners are usually just opening up and the whole town seems "slower." The town has a charm at that time of day that is very unique. Remember to change the batteries in your smoke detector.

Politics.......

2007-02-23T17:12:00.001-07:00

"To be 20 and not a liberal is to have no heart. To be 40 and not a conservative is to have no brain." Sir Winston Churchill.

The Story of MoJinka, the Gheto Fairy.

2007-02-17T06:53:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time in a land soon forgotten lived a little fairy named MoJinka. MoJinka was a very sad fairy since very little good happened in the hood. And since Mr. Hardaway publicly stated that he dislike fairies things have only gotton worse for our little MoJinka. People were getting shot every single day. And the violence puzzled MoJinka. The people of this land always complained about the "man" being the cause of all of their problems. But MoJinka had never seen the "man" anywhere around the land. As a matter of fact there are very few men in the land where MoJinka lives. There are lots of women, and children. Lots of children. MoJinka often thought that she was slowly losing her ability to understand these people in her land. Their language has changed so much since thr early 1980's. A new fairy had taken over the television, it was called M-tv. Now instead of playing outside the children sit inside watching music videos and eating high fat commodity foods. MoJinka often thought that her people have become to believe that they are pampered pets. The great king always provided for the people. The people get free phone service and health care. Health care that people in the land of Suburbia have to pay a heavy penny for. Yet MoJinka feels disapointed when her people complain about having to wait a few hours in order to see the doctor. The great king has even given the people a majic card that they can go to the stores and buy food and recieve money. He has given them free houses and discount transportation. But the people do not appreciate it. They destroy what they have and then complain. This makes MoJinka said. There is still some hope for her land. There are a few bright spots. Men that do stay around. Mothers that instill a need for education into the hearts of the children. And the children. Their eyes are bright and their hearts are still pure. Maybe, just maybe, ther is hope.

Happy Valentine's Day

2007-02-14T05:21:00.000-07:00

Bec, I love you. You are the best. Kristofer

A New Idea

2007-02-12T05:08:00.001-07:00

It is no secret. This technology that we all use to communicate is being used by perverts to stalk and meet children. This weekend alone over 15 men, most soldiers and a pastor, were arrested for having child pornography. Most of this was on thier computers. Pornography is a dangerous addiction for men due to the fact that we are "wired" for visual stimuli. So it only takes a little bit of porn to send a pervert into a hunt for his type of victim. Though prevention is an ideal vision, we still must live in the real world. I propose that all convicted sex offenders should have the capital initials "SP" in their e-mail adresses. An example would be something like this: JDoe@yahoo.SP.com. If we can make it to the moon over 4o years ago using slide rules and mechanical relays ther has to be away to make this "SP" happen. By the way SP means sexual predator.

A New Idea

2007-02-12T05:08:00.000-07:00

It Did Not Take Long

2007-02-09T04:13:00.000-07:00

Have you heard the latest funny joke? KFC has a new dinner that they call the Hillary special. It contains two big thighs, two small breast, and one left-wing. Well it was funny a few weeks ago. I still think that if Obama and Hilary Clinton would quit attacking each other and team up they could have the White house for the next 16 years. Greed and a need for power may be their downfall. Nancy Pelosi is playing the "It is because I am a woman" card. She is wanting a government 757 jet to fly her from California to DC. When the story was leaked she started to back pedal and when that failed she did the "they hate me because I am a woman" thing. I tell my daughters (and son) do not find an excuse find a way. They are growing be to strong individuals. Of course Bec has a lot to do with it. On Friday the 2nd we finally graduated the firefighter recruit class. It was a nice ceremony. We planned for 150 guest, expected 100, and had over 200. This week I taught hazardous materials operations (big freekin' yawn). I hate teaching this dry, dry, dry, course. It could be taught in 2 days. The course is 40 hours. Next Monday check the local fox 23 website (www.fox23.com). Rebecca has been nominated for the Jefferson Ward. This award is for outstanding community service. I hope that she wins. Talk to you soon(er)

PeterbiltTrucks and My Dad's Briefcase

2007-01-29T04:09:00.000-07:00

Went with the wife and the nina to see the movie "Pan's Labrynth." It is a great movie. I forgot how much world history I have forgotten. The movie was set in 1944 Franco Spain. Go see the movie. When we got home I watched a show on the national geographic channel about the Peterbilt truck factory in Denton, Texas. I have always liked Denton. I did business with a company out of Denton for years. My dad was a trucker (among other things that would rhyme with the word trucker.) He always liked Peterbilt trucks or "Petes" as he called them. He would always tell me stories of driving a "big ol' Pete" passing other trucks like "Macks" and "KWs". Dad worked for a lot of different companies but is best job was with a trucking company called "DQ Wise." As a young boy he would take me to the "shop" and let me set in the big trucks. We would rabbit hunt in the field behind the lot and shoot turtles in the pond. I never really liked shooting the turtles but I liked being with him. I would miss on purpose, looking back now I think hid did too. He was the person that fosterd my ability to draw, especially mechanical drawings. When I would spend the night with him and one of my stepmoms he would always say "Son there is some drawing paper in my briefcase." We would set at the table or on the living room floor drawing on the coffee table. We drew "Big ol' Petes passing Macks and KWs."

Hairy Triceps

2007-01-28T08:31:00.000-07:00

No this blog is not named after a used car saleman (but it would be a good name). I was at the gym yesterday, minding my own business, doing tricep extensions. I have been really strict on myself this last four weeks to meet some new fitness goals. The last fire I made I got a little more tired than I wanted too. Anyway, back to the triceps. Doing tricep extensions, with 140 lbs ( i've got my chest stuck out during this part of the blog)I notice that I have grown quite a substantial amount of hair on the back of my arms. Why? My arms have never been cold. I was pondering a waxing. But where would I start and and where would I stop? How about I have it french-braided. That would be awesome! Keep warm and have a good day.

Employee Evaluations Do Not Work.

2007-01-27T05:36:00.000-07:00

I have come to the realization that employee evaluations do not work or do not give an accurate picture of the employees's performance. This week I had my annual employee evaluation completed by my supervisor. Though overall the evaluation was good, it was full of what my wife calls a "compli-cut." That is a compliment that also doubles as a cut down. One quote from the evaluation read "Kris is very knowledgeabe and confident in his abiltiy, how ever this keeps him from being a better officer." What the hell did that mean. I got no explanation from him on that. There were other areas that were also like that. I signed the evaluation and checked the box marked "I disagree with this evaluation." When I turned the evaluation back into him he read over it and asked "are you sure you want to turn this in?" I replied "yes sir." The next day I was at work and the Fire Chief asked to talk to me about my evaluation. He said that the comments that I wrote were fine and that the evaluation was less than accurate. He then quoted Albert Einstein "Great spirits often face violent opposition from mediocre men."

A Good Way to Tell What is on Her mind.

2007-01-26T04:52:00.000-07:00

Okay, I think that I might have a clue about this one. I found out the best way to figure out what kind of mood your wife/girlfriend is in and what has been on her mind lately. Recently my little bride has been out of town so I have been driving her car. I turned on the cd player and found that she had made a cd of her recent, favorite songs. We started out with Christina Aguilera singing "nasty boy." Then we went into a Fergie song, mix in some Shinedown's "Lady so divine." Add a bit of Kiss' "Hotter than Hell." Then just top it of with some "dont you wish your girlfreind was hot like me."

Cigars and Fake Breasts

2007-01-21T14:54:00.000-07:00

I was reviewing several of my last blogs and have come to the realization that all I have been writing about is fire stuff. I guess that I have been working too hard on this academy. So sorry for the FD overload. I always tell new firefighters "let the fire department be what you do, not who you are." As I was unwinding last evening and reading the latest edition of Cigar Aficionado. I really like a good cigar, hell I'll even smoke a bad one. David Coruso was on the cover, I guess he smokes cigars also. My sweet wife and I like to go to our favorite cigar store, buy a couple of nice smokes and retire to the smoking room. They have a huge leather couch that you can sit back and puff your troubles away. Anyway, as I was reading I turned the page to an advertisement that featured a guy sitting on a couch smoking a nice cigar with two hot chicas besides him. The caption was about something like "enjoy yourself or so something for yourself, yada yada yada." These ladies were right shiny. Now early in may days I would not have noticed the cigar, I would have zoomed in on the fake breast. Now I just kind of wondered what type of cigar that was.

Push Starting A K-12 Saw

2007-01-19T19:55:00.000-07:00

This is a rookie Firefighter's attempt to push start a gasoline powered circular saw used for cutting roofs, doors, and cars. It was a joke. You can not push start one of these no matter how hard you try.

They Passed Firefighter One

2007-01-19T17:42:00.000-07:00

Owasso Fire Department Fire Academy 2007-01

"Hey Man, I Found a Leg"

2007-01-16T18:21:00.001-07:00

The academy is going well and we are almost done with the first half. Yesterday the recruits learned and practiced search and rescue inside a building. After the lecture we did the practical part of the module. We set-up the bunkroom at station 1 as an apartment. We used an old rescue manikin as our "victim", we call him Manny. The bunkroom makes a great search and rescue area because we can completely black it out. No light at all. As we were posing the manikin he lost a leg. The manikin is in bad shape (much like Buster from Mythbusters) and I guess the wingnut that held his left leg in place came loose. (That is so wrong on so many levels.) We had the recruits work in teams of 2, wearing full bunkergear and SCBA. The first crew ent in for a search. I was using our thermal imaging camera to monitor thier progress. The camera allows me to see in the dark. The crew went into the and started to search the room. The first thing that they found was Manny's loose leg. They shouted out "Hey......I found......uh, uh,......a leg." What about Barak Obama running for president?.....What if either him or Condi jumped ship and they teamed up? Sweet.

Week Two is Complete, Three More to Go.

2007-01-13T04:26:00.000-07:00

Well it is a little after 0500 and there is an inch of ice on the ground outside. The furnace has not shut off in hours and there is a fire in the fireplace. I went to "take a nap" around 6:00 pm last night and apparently "napped" until four this morning. I do not like winter. We have just finished up a the second week of the fire academy. I had to change several things around due to the pending (now upon us) bad weather. In the pictures included with this blog your will see an exercise that we did for dealing with sprinkler systems. The students had to use wooden wedges to block an open sprinkler head. It was great fun to watch. The other pics are just of the training trailer and of me giving a quick review of the candidates performances. I will spend this weekend writing a 50 question test for the candidates to take on Monday. I hope to write on a few more papers that I have going. My article on the FE website is getting a lot of hits. Keep warm. Kris

MUD Knows History, Kris Knows Fire

2007-01-09T04:11:00.000-07:00

After a thurough historical ass-whipping by MUD I will yeild the floor on history. I was trying to use a bad example to prove and irrelevant point. My wife (Mrs. Beautiful) says I should write what I know. I have included a link to an article of mine that got published on Fire Engineering's web site http://fe.pennnet.com/display_article/281427/25/ARTCL/none/BRNIS/Self-directed-training-teams/ . Day 5 went well in the academy. See ya'll later.

Day Four at the Academy, oh yeah the Nazi thing.

2007-01-06T07:13:00.000-07:00

The first week is over and we all survived. Friday was the hazardous materials awareness level training and certification. I am for sure not a hazmat guy. I was surprised to find, along with my 10 recruits, 18 other students that I had no idea were going to be there. OSU had not sent enough student manuals, ERG's, or test. But we got through. I guess I should have prefaced that whole "success of the Nazi party thing" with this; how the Nazi party was able to be successful in becoming powerful in government. Some would say it was a charismatic leader. Okay if a college drop-out, wannabe artist, closet homosexual, meth addict is a definition of a charismatic leader. And by the way, Hitler was not part Jewish. The Nazi party was so successful at taking over a country (Germany) that only a few years before had been defeated in war was because they were involved. Involved in everything. The Nazi party grew because they infiltrated every level of German society. My Pappy was a tanker in WWII in Normandy. He seldom talked of his experiences in specific detail. For the most part he kept it all inside. He did not hate any of the opponents he fought, he was doing his job. He did dislike the French. He felt like they just rolled over for Germany and waited for the Allies to bail them out.

Fire Academy: Day Three

2007-01-05T04:05:00.000-07:00

The lads are TV stars. The local Fox affiliate came by and shot video of the recruits. They did a great job pretending to be very interested in my lecture. We finally finished up the ICS and NIMS modules required by the Department of Homeland Security. Today is hazardous matrials awareness. For the last 20 minutes of the day I have them shut their books and we have a talk about any issue they want. Yesterday we talked about initiative. As recruits, once they get out to thier assignment, it will be critical to thier success that they take some initiative to do things around the station. Enough of this feel good stuff. The next blog will be on why the Nazi party was so successful.

Fire Academy: Day Two

2007-01-04T03:32:00.000-07:00

It was like Christmas for the recruits. At the end of day one, after sitting through lectures and filling out tons of paperwork from human resources, they all got to open and put together thier bunkger gear. This is the protective clothing that they wear while fighting a fire. There was boxes and plastic bags and paper everywhere. It reminded me of when the kids were little and they dove into their Christmas presents. It was funny to hear 10 grown (that is such a loose term) giggle like boys as they put the gear together. Jan 3 was their second day. The academy covered ICS or Incident Command System. It is rather dry to teach and to take. The fun spot in the day was when the recruits ot to take their group picture. Also it was the first day that we took them to the gym. I have them scheduled for PT on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday.

Fire Academy: Day One

2007-01-03T04:36:00.000-07:00

The fire academy started yesterday. We have 10 new fire recruits, the most that we have ever hired at one time. I would have to say that this is one of the most exciting times in my career. The group is a mixture of guys with no experience, volunteer experience, and one guy who left a larger department to come and work for us. I will keep everybody up -to - date on thier progress.

Crybabies

2006-12-28T04:17:00.000-07:00

It seems that Rebecca and I have being crying a lot lately. And it is okay. After Andi's death we both have walked around on the verge of tears but this is different. It seemed that with Andi gone we both did not want to cry in front of each other because we did not want to upset each other. I know it sounds silly but it is true. Over the past few weeks we have gotten closer than we have ever been. The other night we were watching the movies "World Trade Center" and cried like babies. It struck us right in the heart and hit upon on how we feel about each other. Especially the relationship of Nicholas Cage's character and his wife. How they fought for each other. It was a very powerful tribute to everybody that survived and died that day. Then we have been watching the series "Band of Brothers." (she got it for me for Christmas) We see these young men, we know that they are actors, making history. We have realalized that this was our grandfathers. My pappy was a tank operator in France. I can just see him now. A short, stockey, Oklahoma farm boy driving around France in a tank. I can only imagine what the hell was going through his mind. On a lighter note, I am have one of my articles featured on Fire Engineerings web site soon. I will put the link on this here blog. In Oklahoma we pronounce it "blawg."

Above Average at Walmart.

2006-12-25T07:10:00.000-07:00

Did you know that the average person spends $100.00 each time they go to Walmart? So with that said I am an above average Walmart shopper. It used to be I hated to break a $20.00 bill, now it seems like I am breaking $100.00 bills like crazy. Even a Reuben sandwich costs almost $7.00 at the deli.

Well, enough griping about money. Merry Christmas to everybody.

Don't you wish that the truth in advertising clause pertained to other avenues of our lives. Wouldn't it be cool if we all had a Surgeon General warning across our backs like a pack of cigarettes? The little weasel at work would have one that said "I like the tip of my nose to stay brown and would sell my own mother up the river for a promotion." Or the the cute lady at the end of the bar, hers would say " I am very superficial, this is not my real eye color, hair color, boobs, or thighs. I am crazy and still obsessing over my boyfriend three boyfriends ago." Of course the guy at the end of the bar would have one that said "jerk, jerk, jerk,." What would yours say?

MERRY CHRISTMAS YA'LL

Forgiveness

2006-12-21T15:57:00.000-07:00

I have had to plan my dad's funeral today. This one thing that I felt that I would never had to do. He and I were not close. I had not seen him in almost 20 years. I had only spoken with him only once during this time. He died early Wednesday morning after having a major heart attack the night before. He was an organ donor and his kidneys are now inside two other people. I hope that they take this opportunity to live their life to the fullest, love their families, and hug their children.

I felt it strange to stand along side his body as the ventilators made his chest rise and fall. The doctors stated that his EEG indicated that only his brain stem was working and that all higher function was nonexistent. Across from me was a woman that I never met that had become his wife 18 years ago. I did not know what to say. Would could you say? I met my 8 year old half-sister. I introduced myself as "Hi, I'm Kris, I think that I am your big brother." My daughter has an aunt that is 5 years younger than her.

I stated earlier that it was a heart attack. Nobody really knows. I think he had a massive stroke. His EKG was great (I know how to read them). His wife said that his neck and head were hurting before he died. Historically us DeMauros have strong hearts, it is our brains that have always been a bit suspect. As most of you can attest that know me. They left me alone with him for a while. The tears fell pretty hard. I could not figure it out if I was grieving what I had lost or what I had never had. Sometimes it is hard to tell the two apart. I bent down to his ear and asked him to forgive me and I told him that I forgave him. We are going to have a simple memorial service next Saturday. He wanted to be cremated.

Thanks to Rebecca for all of her love and support and to my beautiful children. Poppy loves you.

What is it, male or female?

2006-12-19T05:18:00.000-07:00

The India Olympic committee has a sticky situation on thier hands. It appears that their best female runner may be male. After a recent complaint the committee had the athlete examined and the result came back male. I don't know if this was some kind of genetic abnormality or if he was just tucking the boys back. I know several "athletes" and have talked with them in tha past about the pressure they feel to perform. Several of the younger guys on the job with me are really into personal fitness. I wish that I had been earlier in my career. These guys buy and use all types of poweders, mixes, juiced, and potions. Eat raw eggs and tons of tuna. These guys also have practically no sick leave left. You can almost bet that at least one of them will call in sick every shift. Those of us that have been around a while get what we like to call the "turkey flu". It affects your eyes and you butt. After you get it you just can't see your ass going to work. I know it is an old joke but it is still damn funny. Have a good day. I got a standard operating procedures review and rewrite committee meeting to attend to this morning. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

It's the death penalty for goodness sakes.

2006-12-16T06:32:00.000-07:00

California and Florida have placed a moritorium on the lethal injection/death penalty due to the fact that it may cause pain and mental anguish for the condemned inmate. In the Florida case the person that established the IV on the inmate missed the vein causing the drugs to go into the surrounding tissue. The inmate was alive for around 30 minutes after the injection. A normal lethal drug injection should render the inmate unconscious in around 2-3 minutes and the bastard should be dead in no later than 15 minutes. Some limp-wristed pussy doctor who probably is a proctologist stated that the inmate suffered. You think? Let me vent on this one folks. For all of you that feel that the death penalty is wrong, you are going to get an ear full. All human life is precious regardless how useless any one human may be. The death penalty is the ultimate deterrent. All of those men and women who have paid for their crimes with their life will never commit another crime again. No repeat offenses after that. Did you know that the last bastard to be executed in Florida was on death row since 1979? He was on death row longer than his victim was alive. Horrible travesty of justice. Now here comes my redneck DNA flaring up. I have spent most of my adult life trying to save people. But, I would have no problem working in a prison starting IVs and killing those people. I could sleep well at night and all would be right with my soul. I am very good at starting IVs in strange and odd places. What about the victims, the families, the children..............what about us?

Here come da bus, here come da bu

2006-12-14T05:20:00.000-07:00

Though we drove it to the station, it had to be hauled away on a tow truck. Below are some of the pictures of the bus. The picture of the fire engine is a good one also. It is engine two. The engine that I work out of. It is a 2003 ALF rescue - pumper. We call it the Anna Nicole as in Anna Nicole Smith. She is big, slow, full of junk, and have had about a dozen men in here at one time or another.

12 firemen, 2 junk cars, I old YMCA bus, and a bunch of tools.

2006-12-13T16:06:00.000-07:00

I have the best job in the world. For the last two days the "City" has paid me my overtime rate to tear up cars and a bus with a backhoe. WOW. I just finished teaching a two-day auto extrication class that focused on mass transit. I had 10 students from our department, most of them soon to be officers. It was one of the best classes that I have ever taught. I used a process called self directed work teams. It pairs experienced firefighters together with less experienced firefighters to work as a team and figure out complex problems. The instructors act as guides, safety officers, and coaches.

The first picture is of me looking into the back of a car that the students were practicing a technique called "tunneling". Using hydraulic rescue tools they cut through the car body to get to the victims. Every one at home is fine, including my sweety. Have a great evening.

11 questions about men.

2006-12-11T04:14:00.000-07:00

As usual I was reading the morning web news and came across an article about men. Of course I made it more relevant. Q. Why do men say they will call you but don't? A. He got tired of listening to you complain about your ex for two hours on your last date. Q. Why do men talk about their jobs during dates? A. Quite simple, men often find their identity in their careers Q. Why do men want to hump everything in a skirt? A. If it bugs you quit wearing skirts. Q. Why do men lie about the littlest things? A. Because when he told you the truth you nagged his ass for weeks and would not shut the hell up. Q. Why doesn't he talk to me? A. This is a two-part question: first you will not shut up. Second a man has a different type of hearing system. You may have said the following: I was at Jenny's house and just wanted a cup of hot coffee with sugar and all she could talk about how much sex her sister Susan has. What he heard was : I want hot sex. Q. Do these pants make my ass look big? A. No. ......................................................................................................................................................................... Have a good day.........Take a moment to say hello to somebody today.

Dance like nobody is watching.

2006-12-10T06:45:00.000-07:00

I have finished a leadership class that has to be one of the best that I have ever attended. This last session was on developing a personal life style that allows you to succeed in your career. It focused on health and wellness, stress relief, and personal development. The key item was to "dance like nobody is watching." Over the next week I am teaching a school bus rescue class. I will be posting pictures over the next few days. I will have to admit I do enjoy teaching. I have never wanted to be a school teacher, but the thought of having a captive audience for all of my jokes and ideas is intriguing. In this school bus class I am going to introduce some new skills to our department and hopefully have an article published in Fire Engineering Magazine on innovative training opportunities. The picture posted with this blog entry is during a training session I developed this past summer. We used a soon to be demolished public swimming pool locker room for live fire training. For those that study management theory I feel that I have reach the top of Maslow hierarchy of needs' pyramid. I have also notice that my bunker coat is too big. It is the one used to wear a few years ago.

Along with that all is good, the wife and kids are beautiful and I got most of my shopping done. Until next time......

Its too danged cold

2006-12-08T05:14:00.000-07:00

Why do we put a scarf on a snowman? Isn't that like giving the wicked witch from the wizard of oz a bubble bath. This morning it is 7 degrees here in our little slice of paradise. I don't think that the heater has shut off any. I watch the morning news while I blogg. Typical stuff this morning, power outages due to ice, car wrecks, politics, blah, blah. OH, Barak Obama versus Hillary Clinton? I am excited about the republican ticket of Giuliani and Condi "hot pants" Rice. Well I am off to the Casa de bomberos, keep warm, keep safe, keep it real yo.

Why Men Cheat...For really

2006-12-05T04:12:00.000-07:00

This morning I read a blog (here is the link http://health.yahoo.com/experts/menlovesex/2/why-men-cheat ) regarding why men cheat. This point of view was the traditional man cheating on his female partner with another female. The author gave four reasons: Biologically we (men) are wired to wander, to get the attention we need or may not be getting from home, in order to get out of a relationship, and finally because the sex is getting boring. The author of the blog knows his stuff, hell he even used a lot of big words. BUT, I think his editor (probaly a woman) may have sanitized it a bit. So, I gonna keep it real for all of us. Some men cheat because they are still little boys. Spoiled little boys want what they want when they want it. Some men cheat because the can see no further in life than the head of their own peckers. God gave us enough blood to run a brain and a dick, but not at the same time. Some men cheat because they are opportunistic. They have no intentions of ever cheating and then along comes Condi Rice, a few drinks, and Bam! We are knocking boots. That was the easy stuff, let's dig a little deeper shall we? Before we married you we were the most brilliant person you ever met. Now the we are married we (men) are the dumbest bastards God ever created. The wife often takes on the role of a mother. Most men do not want a mother. Actually what most men want is Mrs. Cleaver, mixed with the young Elizabeth Taylor (seen Cleopatra?), throw in some Marilyn Monroe, add Rebecca DeMornay in Risky Business, and top it off with any female porn star. Simple huh? Now that I have added sex in the mix, let me explain it. God most assuredly has His "A" game on when he came up with the female body. You can find something beautiful in any woman. Now men have different tastes in women. Some like butts, some like boobs, some like legs, some like certain hair color or race. Most of this stems from early influences in a mans life or first experiences. I wonder how many men married women that look like their school teachers when they themselves were in the 6th or 7th grade? For a man every sexual encounter with his wife is not going to be an epic love scene. Sometimes it is just sex. Nothing bad, but just sex. A man needs to borrow a part of your anatomy, not your brain, and have sex with it. It does not mean he doesn't love you, or that he thinks less of you. It is just sex. It will be the roughess-toughess 15 - 35 seconds you ever had. Now I am not going to talk about the sex act itself. If you and your wife are having issues with different sex, uh, things. Ya'll should have figure that shit out before you got married. It is kind of too late after she has got half of your pension, your truck, and the house to learn that Miss Freak-a-deaky has turned into Mrs Squeaky-squeaky. I am not saying that you should have had sex before you married her, but, maybe you should have at least talked about it before you sprang the old "bobbin' for apples" routine on her during your honeymoon. And finally, a man washes his truck every weekend because he likes nice things. He wants people to think when he drives by "that man likes nice things." So in the spirit of a washed truck, ladies get your ass out of those sweat pants and into a pair of 501s. Do women know that a pair of sweatpants can make even a size 0 ass look like two bear cubs fighting in a gunny sack? Don't give me that bullshit about "I should feel comfortable about our relationship that I can relax and be myself." I can almost assure you that he did not marry you for your backside, but it was a bargaining chip that got him to the table............. Ah shit my wife is up....Better go before she sees me writing this....Yes dear!.......

Why, Why, Why?

2006-12-03T09:14:00.000-07:00

This morning while I was reading the Sunday editorials I began to feel my self getting very angry. Not just piss and vinegar angry, but gas at $2.99 a gallon angry. I was reading an editorial by a Mr. Stanley Crouch. In his editorial he commented about police violence and police killings. Primarily the recent New York police shooting involved an unarmed black man. After reading the entire editorial I finally calmed down and was able to see his view on the matter. I do agree that the vast majority of police related shootings are white officers shooting black men. My question is "why is this so?" Are all black men, all black people, criminals? I will say no. Most of the good male influences in my younger life were black men. (For those of you reading from afar, I'm a white-guy, I mean if Italian-Irish-Cherokee is considered "white".) Mr. Crouch relates some of these troubles to the disparity and the rapid growth of drugs in the black community. I would agree but these are results of an underlying situation that I am still having trouble grasping. Is it from the lack of a strong male role model in the black community. Is it from the growing trend of grandparents raising their grandchildren. What is it? And how has the media shaped this image? The scene from a Jerry Springer episode where a black women with several children confronts her boyfriend about cheating on her with her sister. Here is the boyfriend with gold teeth and a doo-rag speaking fluent ebonics yelling at his girlfriend while she is busy taking off giant golden hoop earrings with fingernails so long that she can barely use her fingers. Then they begin to fight and hair extensions begin to fly!. Finally somebody will say something about her parenting abilities and her only reply is "I feed my kids." Like feeding her kids is something most parents do not do, but she does and it makes her special. For those of us in the "real" world we question ourselves. First; "Why am I watching this?". Second; "If she can afford 200 dollar hair extensions, 75 dollar fingernails, 1,000 dollars worth of jewelry, then why is she living in public housing on government assistance?" Third; "If he can afford gold teeth why does he not pay child support?" I understand that some of this is "cultural differences" but what is going on? Have we as a society failed the black community by trying to compensate for a great injustice? Every community with a large black population has some kind of "Project This" or "Operation That." These groups promote reading, safe sex, drug resistance, and a host of others issues, all important, but there seems to be no change. Why are there so many issues of negativity affecting the black community? Why does this section of black society dwell on a self-destructive lifestyle. Every race, creed, religion, group, or culture has had a history of tyranny and slavery. Show me a culture or society that has not had slavery as parts of it's foundation. The Egyptians enslaved the Israelites. The Inca had slaves, the Mayans had slaves. Heck even many of the Irish immigrants that came to America in the era around 1900 where brought here as a type of slave. Is the reason for white - black racial tension do to the violence between the two groups. I will agree that the violence early on was mostly white on black. But, aren't most black men in prison for homocide there for killing other black men. It has been 42 years since the Civil Rights Act of 1964 was passed. Have things gotten any better? Maybe we should quit blaming the present state of our lives on things that have happened to us or our people in the past. It is so easy to develop a victim mentality and that leads to bitterness. ...... Why is there no white color on the logo to the Rainbow Coalition?

Kasim was a family man, with a AK-47 and an IED

2006-12-01T06:05:00.000-07:00

The picture you see here is of Barry and me using one of our new automatic nozzles earlier this summer. I believe that this was his first or second shift with us. It was a neat picture and appeared in the local paper. We all have seen the television news stories that showcase our soldiers as family men and women serving their country. Most are young, just starting families. What you never see, despite the attempts by the media, is an Iraqi or Iranian insurgent playing with his family in a park or walking hand in hand with his wife. Could it be that sociological differences in our societies are that vast. Does Kasim not value his family? Is this the result of a male dominated culture? I just don't know. Are we witnessing an example of fighting a war with politics and polls? It like James Woods' (the actor) idea: He stated that if the 9/11 attacks happened in Russia, Iraq and Afghanistan would be a giant piece of nuclear glass. Where has America gone? We are losing ourselves in a vast pit of liberal political correctness. The ACLU wants to protect the rights of a muslim or islamic (which one do they want to be called?)women to cover her face with her burka on her DL picture. What the hell? The longer that I live the more I feel that the US should develop an Isolationist mentality......... And for those dumbasses that still are in denial......O.J. did it!

Thermonuclear Family Meltdown

2006-11-28T05:01:00.000-07:00

What is a family? Traditionally it has been a mommy a daddy and the kids. Of course traditions changes. Today the "family" may be a group of people not related at all. A 50% divorce rate has also changed the make-up of the family. Then there is the increasing rate of grandparents raising their grandchildren. This is my case. My mother never kept any of her children past the age of 10 years. All of us were shipped off to aunts, uncles, foster homes, and grandparents. Though it easy to fault her, Dad was AWOL (not only from the marines, but from most of his responsibilities). Whenever I question myself about being a father, I just remember to do everything opposite of what he did. For the most part us humans are social creatures and we develop "groups" or "families". We find others that can offer us comfort and acceptance. The new family may include two mommies or two daddies. Or daddy may become another mommy, mommy may grow a wiener. I often laugh at how my opinions and personal beliefs have changed over the last 10 years. I wonder if this means that I am growing up? I have changed from the bible-thumping conservative that developed social opinions based solely on a Sunday morning sermon into a what I would call a liberal-conservative or a conservative-liberal or middle-of-the-roader'. Shoot, I don't even care that Rosie O'Donnell is a mother. I do disagree with a everything that she has to say. But I respect her right to say it. I would love to sit down and talk with her (icecubes in hell, right?). Have a good day......Be patient with each other........Kris

Volunteer Fire Wars Part 2: "Is this thing on?"

2006-11-27T09:07:00.000-07:00

One of the findings from the 9/11 commission was the inability for emergency responders to effectively communicate to each other. The radio communications infrastructure of the City of New York was not able to handle the volume of radio traffic transmitted and most rescuers could not advise of their condition, locations, or send out maydays. Many of today's leading municipalities have "migrated" to the use of 800 mgh radios. These radios transmit/receive on a frequency that is close to cellular phones and microwaves. By using computers to "steer" the radio transmissions through different channels the users are able to use only a relatively few frequencies to talk to a large amount of end users. BUT, there are some limitations to this technology. 800 mgh, like microwave, is a "line of sight" technology. This means that the radio antenna must have an unobstructed "path" to other antenna on the group. How this effects the end user (the firefighters, police officer, EMT) is that in some situations the radio can not receive or transmit. This is prevalent in large buildings, or in basements. Also you just can't go and buy a radio at a swap meet (maybe a stolen one) and use it. Each radio has what the manufacture calls a "personality". This means that each radio is uniquely identified by the controlling computer. Additionally these radios can cost around 2 - 3 grand each. The NFPA standard for firefighter health and safety is NFPA 1500. Part of this standard, along with OSHA CFR 29.1910.120 requires each firefighter to have a portable radio when they enter a dangerous location or atmosphere. My crew alone carries 12,000 dollars worth of radios on their persons, not including the radios in the trucks. How does this effect the volunteers. CASH MONEY BABY. Many volunteer departments are struggling to pay their gasoline and fuel bills. A radio for every firefighter is a luxury only Santa can bring. Their is cheaper technologies available, but reliability is an issue. I have heard of some departments using CB radios. Can you imagine that dialogue: Dispatcher: "Engine 4, Ladder 2, Squad 2. Report of a house fire on county road 405" Engine 4: "Engine 4 is responding" Trucker: "Hell, where can a fella find a Cracker Barrell, come-back?" Dispatcher: "User on this channel could you standby for a minute for emergency users?" Trucker: "Sure foxy-lady. What is your 20?" You get the picture. Is their a solution? Who knows. That's is the great thing about an obscure editorial buried deeply in the world wide web. I can gripe without giving a solution. Until next time, Make love* not war!!!!. * and by love I mean crazy monkey love. Kris

An Okie at the United Nations.

2006-11-25T20:52:00.000-07:00

Uncle MUD gave me a good idea. I do hereby announce my intentions to be the UN ambassador from the United Nations. Dubya, is you listening'. I hope that it will become a reality. Here is my list of priorities once I make it in there. 1. Remove China from the human rights commission. Having them serving on that commission is like having a fat kid over the chocolate cake conservation committee. 2. Change the UN colors from white and light blue to orange and black. Light blue is for pussies. 3. No more peace keeping missions. Go on ass kicking missions. 4. Make all foreign dignitaries pay their dang parking tickets. Vote for me......ya'll

Volunteer Fire Wars Part I: Not in my backyard

2006-11-25T15:18:00.000-07:00

For those of you that know me it is no surprise that I am proud of my chosen profession. Every third day I get paid to live one of my childhood dreams. Every time I put on my bunkergear and climb up into that big red truck I still feel like a little boy pretending his bike is squad 51. I can even look over my shoulder and see Johnny and Roy sometimes. I always try to be a professional, even though I have a little bit of Jester's spirit in me. Being paid for what you do does not make you a professional. First I believe that a firefighter cannot be paid enough for what he or she does. Professionalism is a personal conviction to doing the right thing. Okay here comes the bitchin'. Around this part of Oklahoma (Okie-homa to you flatlanders) we are seeing a pissing contest between fire departments. Department "X" is wanting to takeover department "Y's" area in order to tap into additional revenue sources. Departments with adjoining districts can't or won't communicate with each other due to a radio system that is inadequate. Of all of the departments that surround my department's area, I can only talk to Tulsa Fire over the radio. The other departments I can see them on an incident, I can give them the finger, even moon them, but I can't talk to them on the radio. There is a group that provides us with a large dose of ass pain on a regular basis. Every time we (my department) makes a job in "their" area they start crying like a group of newborns. They constantly complain that we are trying to take over their area, or get their funding. What a load of bullshit. First, we are funded through sales tax as are 99% of all municipal departments. They are funded through a property tax. In addition all of the residents living in their area by their food, gas, and clothes in Owasso. Second, and most important, as a full-time career department we are obligated to respond to a request for help. PERIOD. Until then. Keep it real yo'

What are you talking about: PG version

2006-11-24T10:45:00.000-07:00

Every family and group has their own language or sayings that are unique to them. When I first married into Rebecca's family I thought everybody had developed a slow leak. Every time you would say something funny or off-colored they would go "pssssshhhht". What the heck is that about? Around our house when you are talking to somebody and they go"huh?" Our reply is to say "chicken". If you are cold you are "fweezin." If you are really cold you are "supa fweezin." If it is really, really cold you are "supa party fweezin." I know,... We are idiots. At the fire station there is a whole other group of terms being used. When you are explaining an action that happened to you, you must qualify it with the phrase "minding my own business." Example: I was at the store the other day, minding my own business, and I ran into Harley.... Also when you are talking about somebody you must first qualify it by saying: Crazy (insert name here), that rascal......... Example: Crazy DeMauro, that rascal, he was telling me that his cousin..... It is not a derogatory comment, it is just language. I hope the turkey was good. I missed all of you. Kris

What are you talking about?

2006-11-24T08:47:00.000-07:00

Every family and group has their own language or sayings that are unique to them. When I first married into Rebecca's family I thought everybody had developed a slow leak. Every time you would say something funny or off-colored they would go "pssssshhhht". What the hell is that about? Around our house when you are talking to somebody and they go"huh?" Our reply is to say "chicken". If you are cold you are "fweezin." If you are really cold you are "supa fweezin." If it is really, really cold you are "supa party fweezin." I know,... We are idiots. At the fire station there is a whole other group of terms being used. When you are explaining an action that happened to you, you must qualify it with the phrase "minding my own business." Example: I was at the store the other day, minding my own business, and I ran into Harley.... Also when you are talking about somebody you must first qualify it by saying: Fuckin' (insert name here), that son of a bitch......... Example: Fuckin' DeMauro, that son of a bitch, he was telling me that his cousin..... It is not a derogatory comment, it is just language. I hope the turkey was good. I missed all of you. Kris

That Damn Microwave is in Therapy.

2006-11-22T04:40:00.000-07:00

Due to a life of exposure to profanity and verbal insults the DeMauro family Microwave ( his name is Mike) is now in therapy. Mike is having to deal with a life long feeling of inadequacy and lack of fulfillment. Mike states he has always been there for us and now that he is having some "performance" issue we have turned on him. For years he has been there with a push of a button, unselfishly giving. Mike really wanted to be a painter. That reminds me....My coffee is getting cold....Where is that fuckin' microwave....... Also, If that damn vacuum starts talking, he is a lying bastard.........

Wheat Grass?

2006-11-19T20:43:00.000-07:00

There is more discussion over wheat grass than the blog about homosexuality. Hmmmmm.

Somebody help me tie my shoes.

2006-11-15T19:48:00.000-07:00

We have been working out on the job. The City pays for all of us to go to a local gym and workout. Even on our days off. So every day at around 0900 a.m. my crew goes for about an hour. Of course we never get an hour do to alarms and medicals. My driver Jeff is a former amature bodybuilder that actually won some competitions. He is a stud. Jeff has become our offical workout coach. I hate that bastard!!!! My arms are so damn sore I can't even wipe my own ass. We do circuit training, going from one excercise to another without rest. That way you get a cardio workout too. Speaking of bastards. During physical therapy today (post knee surgery) I asked my PT "at what point is this supposed to make my damn knee feel better?" He told me to quit whining and get back to doing chop-squats. MUD had a good point in his blog. Don't screw around with your heart. Today's medicine can do wonderful things, IF, they can get to you in time. I have been a paramedic for 15 years and the the changes, for the positive, that I have seen in my career are impressive.

Probing mars and the baby boomers.

2006-11-14T04:05:00.000-07:00

I have a confesion. I'm a space geek. Not a game geek like Rebecca, but a pserson that has always had an infatuation with NASA and space exploration. Maybe it is because I grew up with the space shuttles and apollo missions. In junior high school one of our science teachers, Mr. Markum, was a finalist for the last Challenger mission. I can still remember him running out of the classroom in tears as we all watched the Challenger explode after take-off. One of my biggest space fixations has been the mars probes and the voyagers.

............................................................................................................................................................................

Now, back to leadership. Today we look at the baby boomers, and you know who you are. The baby boomers were born from 1946 to 1964. Every day 1,000 baby boomers turn 60. They have the largest disposable income and tend to spend it on thier grand children. The baby boomer is the workaholic that crusades causes. This group does not tolerate injustice and has been influenced by the civil rights movement. In the workplace this group loves to have meetings. The baby-boomer thrives best in a leadership style that involes cooperation, and work with others on projects.

Have a good day and do something nice for someone today, even if it is for yourself.

Stuffing the ol' manicotti and the silent generation

2006-11-13T05:02:00.000-07:00

Is that a manicotti you got there, or are you glad to see me? I made some awesome manicotti last night. Two kinds. Sausage and spinach. I found the trick to stuffing the manicotti. Use a pastry / cake decorating bag with a large end on it. Just fill the bag, give a squeeze and bingo! During my recent attendance at the FSIO conference at OSU I attended several leadership workshops. The best was about leading different generations. This is the first time in U.S. history that there are four generations in the work force. The first generation that we will talk about is the "Silent Generation", born between 1925 through 1945. There has not been an US president born during this time. This generation was the generation of the world wars.

John Kerry, Tommy Franks, and the $400K Ass Chewing

2006-11-11T04:43:00.000-07:00

Take some time today to think about our veterans, past and present. I will be at the fire station today but I plan on taking my crew to the veteran's memorial in Owasso.

I had a long talk with my son last night. Mostly I did the talking. His grades are less than spectacular and his priorities are a little misguided. (Not that I have room to talk). He will be 16 in April. I told him about the remark that John Kerry made last week, the one about the lack of education and it's relation to the military. I told Kristofer that even though it raised a big stink, there was some truth in it. Right now there are American troops all over the world. When he turns 18 Kristofer will have to register for the draft. We are only one major conflict away from drafting young men. Last night I listened to General Tommy Franks on talk radio. What a great American, and Oklahoman. He was questioned about his feelings on the draft. He, for the most part, was against it. He stated that the American military was the greatest in the world, and that it was an all volunteer military. He does favor the Israel system of mandatory civil service post high school. Not just military, but other civil position. He had some realy good ideas. General Franks is building his museum and leadership institute in his home town of Holburt, OK. I can't wait to go see it. While I was away at the FSIO conference in Stillwater the City of Owasso opened bids for the new fire station. I came in at $400K over estimate. Chief Clark had to justify this amount in a meeting with the City Manager. Apparently Chief took a decent ass chewing but (or butt) the CM approved the amount. Progress is great and expensive. While in Stillwater I took several leadership workshops. The best by far was on leading different generations in the work force. Very good stuff maynard. I will start next weeks blogg's on that issue, unless something else just pisses me off........... KMD

Veteran's Day

2006-11-10T18:37:00.000-07:00

Thank you

Pappy and MUD

from KMD

Hi-ho, Hi-ho, it's off to FSIO I go.

2006-11-07T05:15:00.000-07:00

For the next four days I will be attending the Fire Service Instructors of Oklahoma Congerence at OSU. It is our annual convention in which we are given new rules and regulations and course material updates. I am taking a couple of workshops on understanding the adult learner. I will post updates in the evening. Oh, by the way: GO VOTE!!!!!!!!TODAY!!!!!

My Senator went to DC and all I got was this shirt.

2006-11-06T10:57:00.000-07:00

First things first. Yesterday was my first shift back since the "Knee". I missed my crew and I was glad to be back. Nothing warms your heart like listening to your crew bring you up to date on everything they did while you were gone. We made a few calls, nothing to extraordinary. Do I need to say anything about tomorrow? GO VOTE!!!! Our "gubner" started a reading incentive program a few years called "Read Ya'll". I am not making this up. Maybe we should make up a program called "Vote Ya'll". Well folk's I gotta go unload fire wood from my truck and deliver some scaffolding. Se ya.

Smoke Detectors

2006-11-03T10:33:00.000-07:00

Slow news day here In Bongo-Bongo. The one good note is that the Cherokee Nation has donated over 300,000 dollars to various rural fire departments throughtout Oklahoma to aid in recovering expenses from this years wildland fires. Good for them. With this constant draught and the forecast for a warmer than normal November it could play out to be a busy month in the grassfire department. Over the last 2 weeks we have had a couple of children die in house fires. It is so very important to have a working smoke detector in your home. Don't just rely on the dual power (110 vac/ 9 vdc) that the builder put in your home when it was new. Spend 4.00 and get a old fashioned battery detector. They work very well.

Fags, Dikes, and the Sickle Cell.

2006-11-02T05:26:00.000-07:00

For some of us the civil war is alive and well. So many special interest groups claim civil rights violations based upon choices not unchangeable circumstances. The proliferation of the "I'm a victim" mentality has affected our society and our moral make-up. Now before everybody with a rainbow bumper sticker on their cars rain hell down on me, just wait. I know that many people have had their civil rights violated, some have even been killed, because of their sexual orientation. I know that not all female softball players are lesbians. I know that only a few black women chose to stay at home have have child after child after child with no fathers or means to support them. I believe that there are as many white, Hispanic, Italian mothers that do the same. And I have relatives that believe that the sickle cell is the great equalizer. Of course it is out of their ignorance that they do not know that sickle cell anemia is not a black person disease. It affects many races of African, Latin, and yes, Mediterranean heritage.

We must realize that sometimes choice is not a civil right. Remember the part about life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness. It is not your "right" if you are man and want to have sex with another man. It is a choice. You should not get special treatment because your gay. As far as I know there never were "Gay only" water fountains. What would happen if I organized a "White-middle class-working man-straight-married-with kids-mortgage-SUV" pride parade. People would go nuts. I have also found that most true "homophobics" that actually lash out at gays and lesbians are only acting with a knee-jerk reaction to their own questions about their sexual orientation. As for me, I think God had his "A" game on when He designed the female body. With that all said I feel that a person should not be adversely treated because of their sexual choices. It should be a non-issue. ........Now the race card....

Did you know that genetically all humans are 99.9% identical? And of the millions of lines of genetic code, only 10 genes are responsible for the color of our skin. I feel that race is more defined by culture than by color. Look how the black culture has so influenced the popular culture in our country. Even the most conservative person knows about the rapper 50 cent. I use the word black instead of African-American because of the white people born in Africa that have immigrated to the U.S. They should be classified as African-Americans. Since the big vote in 1964 white America has been on a cycle of perpetual apologies and amends. Did you know that less than 1/2 of current blacks in America can trace the heritage back to slavery.

Let's just start to respect each others cultures, heritage, and history. It is only then that we can change from "peoples" to a "people."

.......But what do I know......I hear the dryer buzzing. I better get to it, I don't what my hood that the grand wizard gave me to wrinkle my favorite wife-beater.

Happy All Saints Day.

2006-11-01T16:33:00.000-07:00

To my few friends that are Catholic..Happy All Saints Day. Thanks for all of the great replies and comments that ya'll have been giving me. I find it encouraging. I have been attending a series of Leadership classes at work. It has been very thought provoking. I have also realized that I can do anything, but I can't do everything. Delegation is a week area of mine. So guess where I get to focus on. Short blog today, got to finish a video...... Tomorrow's topic "Faggs, Dikes, and the Cicle Cell"

Smokin' Weed With Jesus, part 3

2006-10-31T03:57:00.001-07:00

Evolution vs Inteligent Design vs Adaptive Creationism...ding ding ding , in this corner from.....

Last night the hot little number that I have been with for the last 15 years went to see the movie Saw with me. It was, umm, okay. It is pretty easy to use low lighting levels and lots of fake blood to hide a week script. But I digress. We met in Owasso after a day of running errands seperately so we drove seperate cars home. On the way home I had a talk with God. As a Christian I am to help spread the "good news". The good news is this; God loves me so much that in order to keep me from eternal damnation in hell He gave up his only son to die for me. I get that part. I accept that part. I accept His son. But how am I supposed to convert people with what seems like a threat. God loves you. He wants you to live forever. All you have to do is accept His Son.....but if you don't your will burn forever in a lake of fire and torment. Have a nice day.

Now, lets Evolve. All of you radical evolutionist that laughed and part one and two keep laughing in the spirit of fairness. The Theory of Evolution is just that, an Theory. Charles Darwin did a great job on this one, but on his deathbed he confessed Christ as his personal savior. It may have been a last minute spiritual life-preserver just in case. In my experiences things left alone in nature do not evolve, the decay. It is how nature is. In essence evolution is based upon the idea that life advances based upon billions of accidents. For example take the blind cave fish. If he had indeed evolved why did he not develop the abilities of seeing in the dark or sonor. Instead he just lost his eyes.

Inteligent Design is the new scientific attempt by the conservative right to counter the evolutionist. It is a theory that God did it. It is full of holes and paradoxes just like evolution. Most religious christians would say that our minds cannot comprehend the works of God. But what about us being made in His image?

I feel that the third option is better than all of the rest, but not without it's own holes. Adaptive creationism is a theory that is advancing. It states that All of creation came from a divine spark and follows preset laws of natural selection and adaptive strategies, but beyond that it is up to the created to develop.

But I could be wrong. What I do know is that there is a God. And He has shown me that the truth is called Grace and Mercy. He showed me grace four years ago when I almost died. He showed me mercy when I woke up 6 weeks later with my mind still intact. Since my recovery I have had the opportuniy to save two people from fires. One man was during a fire in a metal building converted to a home. The second was a boy that I was able to pull from a burning plane crash. I say this not to hype on myself, I was working with an excellent crew. But to show that the grace that God gave me was able to be returned. Good Mojo.

I am currently reading a book by Barack Obama called "The Audacity of Hope". A very good read. Even if you are a extreme right-wing conservative you will find something in this book.

Have a save and happy halloween......KMD

Cartoons on the Blog

2006-10-30T20:10:00.000-07:00

Some of you may know, and some of you have been victims, of my cartoons. I have made a new Blog to publish my "BLOGTOONS". Find the link on the right that says "CARTOON" and click. For those that can't see the cartoon very well, just click on it and it will enlarge. KMD

Oklahoma Task Force One gets a new Rig!!

2006-10-30T09:06:00.000-07:00

I'm proud to say that I am a member of Oklahoma Task Force One (OKTF-1), Oklahoma's urban search and rescue team. Our team will deploy to large scale manmade and natural disasters througout the US and it's allies and territories. The picture to the left is of our new USAR unit. Sweet, huh? It is built by Hackney and Sons (They also build beer trucks). Hackney and Sons is a subsidary of Gruman. Gruman built the A-6 intruder, the A-10 warthog (airplanes), and the apollo lunar excursion module. My current assignment is as a "Medical Specialist" so I get to craw through rubble, holes, and trenches and treat victims.

Smokin' Weed with Jesus, part deux.

2006-10-29T09:28:00.000-07:00

Have we all recovered.

Some of the coolest church people I know are the Methodist. The Methodist are, in my my best understanding, Catholics mixed with a little Jimmy Buffett. We had a friend that was a Methodist Pastor. He was so cool. I went into his office one day and he has a poster on the wall that says "Go Bocephus". You gotta like that.

Mentioning the Catholics. I like some of them to, though that whole child abuse thing is a huge black eye that is going to take a big' ol glory filled ice pack to fix. I have found that they (Catholics) are more "real". They don't pretend to be more than what they are and seem to accept their limitations. My only question is that I feel I can go directly to God with my prayer requests. One of my buddies at work is catholic. He has tried to explain it to me with limited success.

Well that is that for now. I 'll continue this over the next few days. By the way, be careful of hitting the "NEXT" button when scrolling threw Blogs. I happened onto a page that had a naked guy sitting on a staircase pulling on his pud. It scared me. That ol' boy was packing more meat than a Jimmy Dean sausage Truck.....

Smokin' Weed with Jesus.

2006-10-29T05:46:00.000-07:00

Here is my first attempt a some type of commentary on formalized religion:

If somebody was to ask me, "Kris, what are your religious beliefs?" I would have to really think about it. For a long time. (the sound of crickets in the background).

........Still thinking.........

Okay. First I would have to explain my opinion of the whole religion racket. You have to remember that I am the type of guy that when you ask him for the time, he will tell you how to build a clock. I am not a religious man. My experiences with 90% of religious people have left me feeeling deflated, unworthy, and a like a second class citizen. I do believe in God and salvation through Christ. But we will get to it later. I guess my biggest observation is in the paradoxical mannerisms that often surround the Holy "in crowd". ( that is some awful big words ya'll).

Let us first look at the evangelical-charasmatic-non denominational movement. This group has based their doctorine almost entirely upon the book of Acts. Many of them like to say that they beleive like a Baptisit until you get to the book of Acts. Often these groups form from splinter factions that leave other churches because Sister So and So turned her nose up at Sister Who-a-what's-it. My wife and I got wrapped-up with a group like this early in our marriage. We left a church when the pastor "quit" and went with him to "pioneer" a new church. Which actually meant that I had a steady pay check and my tithes would help pay for the storefront that the pastor wanted to rent.

Now the Baptist. Sorry to say it, but the Southern Baptist Convention does not have a copyright on salvation. My encounters with this group has often been the most harsh. It usually goes like this. "Hello brother" says the Baptist. "Hey, how you doin'" says me. "You attend church anywhere?" asks the Baptist. "No, we are kinda in between churches right now" says I. "Well you and your family should come and visit our church this Sunday" advances the Baptist. "Really, where do you ATTEND church?" asks I. "Oh, we are members at the First Baptist Church of (insert name of city/town here) Tabernacle" says the Baptist as his chest swells. "Oh, that's nice" replies I while taking 2 steps back. Now the Baptist cocks his head to one side, puts his hands in his pockets and begins to rock back and forth between his toes and heels. "Yeah me and the wife teach the young married couples class on Sunday mornings". I don't think that I have ever called Rebecca "the wife". "That's cool" I say. "Rebecca and I taught the blended family classes at our old church" I continue. Blended family is the churchy-politically-correct way of saying divorced and remarried. "Well praise God" says the Baptist. "THOSE people really need to be ministered to sometimes". I check the buttons on my shirt to make sure that the scarlet D on my chest is not showing. "You know, we sure could use a good man like yourself to help us out in our church. We have been thinking about starting a blended family class and a class for the retarded" says the Baptist. "That is nice" I reply. "I think your family would fit in nice at our church" invites the Baptist. "We have a great mens group that goes fishin and to ball games. The women folk get together for crafts and prayer. We even have a youth group that is going to Bongo-Bongo to help build a church for those people" says the Baptist. "No doubt that the divorced/remarried and retarded people of Bongo-Bongo are overjoyed" thinks I.

"You know, I was a young man like yourself when I started to attend our church and now I am a Deacon" says the the Baptisit. "Wow, you mean I could be a Deacon?" replies I. "Well praise God you could, in time" says the Baptist. "Ya'll think you might make this Sunday, I'll introduce you to the preacher" continues the Baptist. "Well praise God" Says I. "Let me see" I continue. "Well I don't have my son this weekend, but I probally could call my ex-wife and talk to her about it."

The expression on the Baptist's face begins to change. He takes 2 steps back. "Your ex-wife" asks the Baptist. "Yeah" looking from side to side I continue "Sometimes I think she's retarded" I wink and laugh. The Baptist takes 2 more steps back and now he has a expression on his face that makes me wonder if I had farted. "Well, if you can't make it this Sunday just come when you can." the Baptist offers as he climbs into his truck. "Okay, we will try to make it" I offer. "That retarded blended family class sounds like something me and the wife would like" I tell him. "Great I will talk to the pastor about it, but he may want to pray about it some" the Baptist tells me as he starts his truck. "I understand" is my reply. Sensing my disappointment in losing my chance at being a deacon someday, the Baptist offers "Well you know we always need somebody to help around the church, you know doing odd jobbs. Brother Ramirez always needs help with the flowebeds and I bet Sister ShaQuenda could use your wifes help in the nursery". Is his counter offer. "Sure" I say back to him. "Well I got to go now, hope to see you soon" says the Baptist as he rolls up the powerwindows on his truck. As he drives away I can see that he says "God bless you" as he waves. I turn and look an my family and think "He already has".

Relax. Take a deep breath. I will say that two of the most sincere men that I have ever met and I hold the greatest respect for are two Baptist guys. They are men that I look to as mentors and brothers.

To Be Continued.

Left-knee, Right-knee, Weenie.

2006-10-28T09:57:00.000-06:00

For all of my loving fans (Becc and Dennis) I have seemed to be on the road to a full recovery from my knee surgery. The swelling has gone down and now I am left with a stubbly knee and two scars. This surgery has been a lot better than when they operated on my right knee. Rehab has been going well, or should I say Physical Therapy. I would hate for anybody to think that I need to go to rehab for substance or alcohol abuse. My PT's are good and they laugh at my jokes.

Yesterday there was a women in the pool doing water therapy. She had her hair up in a "Holy bun" and was wearing a very, very modest swimsuit. I was laying on the exercise mat, which sets next to the pool, having my leg twisted up by my frickin' head. I hear this lady huming a song. I listened for a while and fiqured out she was humming "I love rock n roll" by Joan Jett. Awesome!

You see, I have a deep fondness for Joan Jett. I was a young lad when I first saw a poster of her. She was wearing black leather pants. (Grrrrrrr). It was then, staring at that poster, that I first put it together that I really liked women !

WOW... Technology

2006-10-28T09:03:00.000-06:00

Who would have ever thought that I would be using the World Wide Web to publish my thoughts for the world to read. Of course the only person who will probally read this is my darling wife (just to be nice). I hope to use this space to discuss life, politics, religions, professions, family, and that whole space-time-continuim thing. I still think that Condi Rice is the love-child of Mr. Spock and Lt. Uhura

Is this thing on?

2006-10-28T08:03:00.000-06:00

Hello...... Hello. Is this thing on.